Zack Calderon
Zack Calderon
on his breakout role in Amazon Prime's "The Wilds"
Amazon Prime's "The Wilds" is a show about community, survival, and self-discovery. Season two introduced a group of boys stranded on an island, much like the girls we met in season one (Shoni stans, please rise). The boys make up 'The Twilight of Adam,' the other half of what we've come to realize is the social experiment of the girls' 'The Dawn of Eve' from season one. Zack Calderon is one of those boys, and I had the opportunity to chat with him about his character Rafael Garcia. I found it impactful that Zack's character has a storyline centered around his identity as a person of color, as Raf has to commute from Tijuana to San Diego for school. There is also some exploration of the nuance of class in his flashback plotline with his family, and I found it so powerful and resonate. Zack's 'Raf' is the quiet, sensitive leader on the boys' island and has quite the character arc as the season progresses. Zack was so gracious and lovely to talk to. We talked about his role, but we also talked about life — and he gave me some really fucking good advice. I'm always floored by these interviews and it's such an honor to do them. I feel like the luckiest person on the planet because of l'Odet; I hope you glean even just one good thing from this conversation. Also if you haven't already binged this show, this interview contains spoilers and you'd do well to catch up. Season two released on May 6th; you can stream both seasons on Amazon Prime now. Please read on to get to know Zack! ✦
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Cariann Bradley: I have some questions prepared for you, but maybe you can just start by telling me how you got involved with “The Wilds.” How did you get this role?
Zack Calderon: I auditioned back in November of 2020. Being an actor, they always tell you for every 100 no’s there's one yes, right? And at least for me, when the pandemic hit, I felt like my 100 no’s that I'd already racked up had just been depleted. It very much felt like I was, once again, fighting an uphill battle. I was going through a lot of stuff emotionally and mentally and had gone home to my parents' house for about a month or so to get my head back in order. I remember getting this audition and I did it and it was really cool. The show wasn't out yet. It was just the trailer. I sent it in and never heard anything about it. And then in January of 2021 my agent texted me and said, "Hey, they never found the guy for this. They want you to come back in. Can you do it?"
I got the sides at 11:00 a.m. on Thursday morning and it was due at 7:00 a.m. Friday morning. It was 12 pages and four scenes. I had a job at the time so it was truly just like every second I wasn't working, I was looking at these sides and trying to memorize them in order to be able to do it that night. My friend and I put it on tape. At like 10:00 at night, I edited it. It was uploading as I was falling asleep so I set an alarm so that I could wake up at 4 a.m. to send it off. [Laughs]
And then it just snowballed. A week or so later, I got it. And I think two weeks after that, I moved to Australia. So it really was like I had two and a half weeks to get my life in order and it went so incredibly quickly. And it was a dream. It was a dream. It's what every actor hopes for, right? That call that changes your life.
Cariann: Wow. That’s incredible.
Zack: Also, my agent's ringtone on my phone is the “Succession” theme song. I can still vividly remember what it felt like to see her name pop up calling me. I think I actually answered the phone with “shut the fuck up.” And she responded with, "Excuse me?" And I said, "Oh, I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. Go ahead. Go ahead." [Laughs]
Cariann: [Laughs] I love that! And I love the show. I watched the first season when it came out and when I found out there was going to be a group of boys in the second season? I was shook. I couldn't wait for the second season to come out. I love ensemble casts like that where there's just a big group of people the same age. I feel like everyone gets really close. What was your experience going there and meeting everybody? Did it go well?
Zack: I think that we all got extremely lucky. What I love so much about the creators of this show is that they aren't afraid to take risks on newer talent. For them to take a chance on us, it was pretty wild. Oh — ‘wild,’ I already said it! We all met on a plane going to Australia and it was almost every boy and then Reign and Jenna on the plane. We started talking and then we realized that we were literally all sitting next to each other and had no idea that we were all the cast of the show. But anyway, Amy and Sarah did an incredible job of casting a group of people that aren't assholes. We really look out for each other. I think it's a really lovely thing.
Because again, especially with casts this big, it really is a crap-shoot whether you're going to get along with everybody or not. To be stuck in a different country with essentially 15 strangers and have to figure that out? It's nice that I can look at everybody in the cast and know that I have something with each of them. It really did become this big family. We'd spend all of our weekends together. We'd go on trips together. There are so many people in this cast — and hopefully they feel the same — that I'll be friends with for a very long time.
Cariann: I interviewed Mia Healey [also of “The Wilds”] as well. She said the same thing. Just like a big family.
Zack: Yeah, Mia's great. And I think it is to the girls' credit, because I can imagine being in their position and seeing that the show that they had flagshipped is now bringing in an entirely new cast. They were nothing but kind and generous and welcoming and they were incredible. We lucked out in terms of the welcoming committee. Like we were very, very fortunate.
Cariann: My creative director and I are also just so curious — was it physically demanding, the shoot?
Zack: I've been asked this a couple of times and I always feel weird saying yes because I got to be on a TV show and go live in Australia and go and mess around with a bunch of my friends for six months, right? I always feel like there are so many more physically demanding jobs than mine, but I think there was definitely an aspect of this job that I wasn't necessarily expecting — getting picked up in the dark and getting brought home in the dark — and the hours you do spend in the daylight, you're standing on a beach rarely getting the opportunity to sit down because you're just losing daylight as the day goes on. But definitely emotionally and physically — you couldn't really turn your brain off. You kind of had to be on at all times. So yeah, I would say that it was very much mentally exhausting. But yeah, there are much more demanding jobs than mine.
Cariann: I feel like with the girls' season, the first season, there was a lot of diversity in the cast — but it wasn't really part of the plot. And I feel like in the boys’ group, your character was the first one where being a person of color was a part of his plotline. How was that? How did you connect with the story of your character?
Zack: Yeah, I mean, I'll be quite frank with you — none of us really knew our roles when we got there. I did not know that I was going to be who I was in the show when we got there. We literally got the scripts while we were in quarantine and all of us were on a Zoom and learned together that I was going to be the one that met Leah, Sarah’s character. And to be honest, I never thought that I would have this opportunity. Very rarely do people hang shows on people of color. It's obviously getting better over time at least, but it’s not necessarily something that's been the gold standard for a very long time. It was the most exciting thing. It was the dream come true, right? To be able to be the person that got to work with Sarah and be the eyes of this season — of course it's an ensemble show, but you see the show through Leah's eyes and then eventually you see it through Raf's eyes. It was incredible.
I've gone on my own journey of self discovery about being a person of color. I think every person's journey is their own and subjective to their own lifestyle and their own upbringing and experiences. And I think that to be able to play this character and hopefully do it justice, people can resonate with it and find a piece of themselves in — that is the biggest thing for me.
I know that growing up I always had a really difficult time with Halloween. I always had a really difficult time finding the character that I could go as, because there weren't a lot of people that looked like me. And I don't think people are going to go as Raf from "The Wilds" for Halloween. [Laughs] But if someone wanted to, they could. Or if they went on the internet and searched Latinx characters on TV, then hopefully Raf would come up and that would resonate with someone. That would give a younger version of me hope that there are opportunities out there for them in the future.
Cariann: That’s beautiful. You know, the show deals with a lot of heavy topics. And I have a little bit of the mental illness — [Laughs] I'm in therapy. Mental health is very important to me. When I was watching the show — both seasons — I had to take breaks because it felt very heavy to me. A lot of the backstories. Like, I have a really interesting relationship with my parents and my family and my hometown. A lot of the stories really hit home. I really like Raf's storyline with his parents and the differences in class and how his character wasn’t feeling like he really belonged. And also the situation with his girlfriend’s family. That was really interesting. What did you think about that and how did you get into that place?
Zack: Yeah, I think what's great about this show in general is that you may not necessarily have the same upbringing or lifestyle as a character, but there's enough of a way in for you to figure out what you’ve experienced. At least for myself, I struggle a lot with identity and with my parents and I'm incredibly lucky that I have been given some of the most incredible parents that have guided me through a lot of really tough crap. And with Raf, I don't know — there's something about being a little directionless that really resonated with me. He knows that he needs to figure it out. He knows that he eventually will, but he looks to other people to tell him what to do, who to be. I definitely resonated with that growing up.
Raf, he's constantly in pursuit of that identity. And whether it makes his parents unhappy or whether it makes Marisol's family happy or unhappy, I think he's always going to be looking for that way to find who he is. I think we all do that from time to time. Especially in high school, right? We have to remember that we're playing high schoolers. So, in a time where we feel completely identity-less, we are constantly looking for someone to tell us who we are. And I mean, I don't think that necessarily stops when you get out of high school because then the playground just changes, right? You're the same person. You bring all of your baggage with you. It's just a different environment.
But yeah, I think that Raf's relationship with his parents, I identified with the idea that I want to make my parents proud. I want to be someone that they are proud of. And the baggage that comes with being in pursuit of making them proud and I don't know — the fight to find your own person inside of that. I don't know if any of that made sense.
Cariann: No, it made sense to me.
Zack: Okay, good.
Cariann: I think that that's why shows like this really resonate with audiences and that's why I'm so... like, I love doing this. Talking to you and Mia — you said you have a really great family and Mia said the same thing. It's almost like you have that armor on yourself so you can take that into your character; like, that is a comfort that only you can bring into your character to be strong enough to portray a hard story like that and be able to connect with people that might not be there yet. That's what I love most — that gets me amped.
Zack: I feel like I was talking about this the other day, that the family I have now, they've always obviously been my family, but it took us a while to get to this point, right? And it took us through peaks and valleys and so I think that I always want to just encourage people that this is not forever. Whatever is happening right now is not forever. This is all temporary. Anything can hopefully be fixed or at least you can try. I always just keep saying: it's chaos, be kind. We're all just trying to do our best.
Cariann: Yeah, that's such great advice. That's beautiful. Yeah, that really resonates with me. I know this doesn't really have much to do with what we were talking about but—
Zack: No, please.
Cariann: Well, I'm estranged from my dad. We don't speak; October was the last time we spoke. And it was, like, years in the making. Seven years in therapy trying to get to a point where either 1.) I was going to try to make it work, having a relationship with him, or 2.) I was going to have to cut him out completely. There was no in-between. It was very unhealthy and came to a breaking point — it felt like he had a lot of his own stuff and was projecting it onto me. And I'm young, I'm 26, but I am still trying to figure out who I am and become my own healthy person. And yeah, I don't know. I've been hard on myself. I've felt guilt, real guilt. But my therapist's biggest thing is ‘be kind to yourself.’ Like, just be kind to yourself. We're all being so hard on ourselves all the time. Especially in the last two years — we didn't sign up to have two years of our twenties taken away by a global pandemic.
Everyone's out here doing their best and that makes me sad because I also feel like my dad is probably doing the best he can at this point, even though it doesn't feel like that sometimes. There were some similar themes in the show and it definitely got me thinking.
Zack: It's definitely helpful for us to see the other side of things for sure. But, to your credit, I think there's always that one person in all of our lives, right, where we go ‘whenever I have the opportunity to talk to this person, this conversation's going to be so epic and I'm finally going to say all the things I've always wanted to say for forever and it's going to be fantastic.’ Then you get to that moment and you regret what you didn’t say. Kudos to you for working on yourself to be able to get to a point where you could even have the conversation in the first place. And if it's not now, maybe it's later. We are always in pursuit. If it's not now, and he's not in a place where he can do it and you've done all the work you can do to get to a place where you thought it would be working, you can always press pause. But you can also always come back.
Cariann: Wow. Yeah, I think that's what I have to remember and I talk about this a lot in interviews — you have to zoom out and see the full picture.
Zack: It's so hard. It's so incredibly hard to not be stuck in the middle of a moment. I deal with that all the time. I am the person that goes to the worst case scenario. Twenty-three hours out of the day I'm thinking of the worst-case possible scenario. It is hard to look at things from a macro level. And now after getting out of the spirals that I've been down myself and looking back at that time and going like wow, in that moment, I thought it was over. Like I had no idea what I was going to do. I thought this was going to be the rest of my life. And then you remember like ‘oh and here I am and I'm fine. And I'm okay. And I'm safe. And I have a roof over my head. And I have people who love me.’ And I just find that gratitude is always the best in those moments.
Cariann: Yeah, definitely. And I'm proud of myself. I really am. I've worked hard.
Zack: Damn straight.
Cariann: And we're all working hard to get to where we are. I feel like that's also why a lot of people identify with shows about teenagers because everything's so extreme when you're a teenager. Like everything's happening for the first time. Everything feels like the end of the world. I think we all still feel like that, but like you said, it's just a different backdrop.
Zack: Absolutely. I think that's why this show resonates with people that are older than just high schoolers! Because they can either look back at it and remember feeling like that, or be 40 and still feel like that, right? Just because a character has an arc and you feel like they've gotten over it, that is very much like TV. That is a dramatization of real life, right? Like if you look at the character of Leah, for example, like Leah's got to go to therapy. Leah's got to get some stuff under control and Raf clearly has some undiagnosed anger issues. [Laughs] But if they were a real person, you'd be like ‘okay, so here's my therapist — give them a quick call. We'll have a couple of chats.’ [Laughs]
And ironically, the whole thing is led by a "therapist" in the show.
Cariann: It is ironic and it's so fucked up. [Laughs]
Zack: And so fucked. [Laughs] So fucked. But I kind of love it. I think Rachel, who plays Gretchen, said something like, "[Gretchen] cares about humanity more than she cares about humans." And I think that's such an interesting take on it and I think it's so accurate too — like she really does care about her project more than she cares about the individuals that are within it. I just find that fascinating.
Cariann: And at the end of season two when she's talking to Leah and says something like, ‘Well, look at you now. You're a strong woman. You have fortitude and gumption.’ That still doesn't change the fact that she’s fucked up now. Like even more so than before. You know what I mean?
Zack: Oh yes. Yeah. No, no, no Gretchen should 100% get Leah's medical bills, for sure. Like all of her therapy bills should just be forwarded to Gretchen. And I mean all of their therapy bills. Honestly, I think it would be funny if our third season would just be us in therapy the whole time recounting all the dramatic things that happened to us. [Laughs]
Cariann: That's what you all need. [Laughs]
Zack: Yeah, right, right, exactly.
Cariann: I asked Mia something similar and I want to ask you. If, fingers crossed, there's a season three, what do you hope for your character? Like what do you want for Rafael?
Zack: I've thought a lot about that. Something that was really fun about my character was that he very much had an arc, right? I love how fun it was to play around with that and just see how different he was by the end. When Raf says, "Some of us are becoming monsters," I think he's talking about himself. I mean sure, he's referring to other people, but he's also talking about himself. And I think that he is a little bit scared to be in his own skin at the moment.
I think it'd be really fun to play with the idea of ‘how does one settle and reconcile the actions that you've done when pushed to your greatest limits,’ right? And what is the justification of doing something that you think may ‘be a good thing’ but others may not, right?
It's so interesting to watch who Raf is now and what this means for him. I'd like to see him take on a role of leadership. I think that he is definitely ready for it. I think that he's a level head that maybe could have been more necessary and useful on the island if he was more outspoken and had the courage to do so.
I would love to see more collaboration between him and some other characters. Obviously, I'd love to keep working with Sarah and I'd love to explore how these two forces are so different. I've been saying that Leah and Raf — their input is the same, but their output is different. I think that they both have the same intentions. They have the same goals. They have similar backgrounds, but they express them vastly differently.
But a more outspoken version of Raf would be great.
Cariann: That is fascinating. Yes. I would love to see that, too. And I don't want to take much more of your time. I really appreciate—
Zack: No, this is awesome. I could be here all day. This is great.
Cariann: I really appreciate you talking to me and I love this show. I think it's beautiful. I think the work that you've put into your character is great. I love Raf. Hopefully I get to see him for another season. I just appreciate what you're doing — making art that's connecting with people. It's beautiful and it's what keeps us going and I'm always grateful to learn more about it.
Zack: Well, that's really sweet. Thank you very much. This has been lovely. And congratulations on the work that you've done with your dad.
Cariann: Thank you so much for saying that.
Zack: And whether it progresses further or it stops here for now, take pride in the fact that you did tough shit.
Cariann: Yeah.
Zack: Because a lot of people wouldn't.
Cariann: Yeah. And just be kind. Be kind to ourselves.
Zack: "It’s chaos — be kind."
Cariann: And we're all working hard to get to where we are. I feel like that's also why a lot of people identify with shows about teenagers because everything's so extreme when you're a teenager. Like everything's happening for the first time. Everything feels like the end of the world. I think we all still feel like that, but like you said, it's just a different backdrop.
Zack: Absolutely. I think that's why this show resonates with people that are older than just high schoolers! Because they can either look back at it and remember feeling like that, or be 40 and still feel like that, right? Just because a character has an arc and you feel like they've gotten over it, that is very much like TV. That is a dramatization of real life, right? Like if you look at the character of Leah, for example, like Leah's got to go to therapy. Leah's got to get some stuff under control and Raf clearly has some undiagnosed anger issues. [Laughs] But if they were a real person, you'd be like ‘okay, so here's my therapist — give them a quick call. We'll have a couple of chats.’ [Laughs]
And ironically, the whole thing is led by a "therapist" in the show.
Cariann: It is ironic and it's so fucked up. [Laughs]
Zack: And so fucked. [Laughs] So fucked. But I kind of love it. I think Rachel, who plays Gretchen, said something like, "[Gretchen] cares about humanity more than she cares about humans." And I think that's such an interesting take on it and I think it's so accurate too — like she really does care about her project more than she cares about the individuals that are within it. I just find that fascinating.
Cariann: And at the end of season two when she's talking to Leah and says something like, ‘Well, look at you now. You're a strong woman. You have fortitude and gumption.’ That still doesn't change the fact that she’s fucked up now. Like even more so than before. You know what I mean?
Zack: Oh yes. Yeah. No, no, no Gretchen should 100% get Leah's medical bills, for sure. Like all of her therapy bills should just be forwarded to Gretchen. And I mean all of their therapy bills. Honestly, I think it would be funny if our third season would just be us in therapy the whole time recounting all the dramatic things that happened to us. [Laughs]
Cariann: That's what you all need. [Laughs]
Zack: Yeah, right, right, exactly.
Cariann: I asked Mia something similar and I want to ask you. If, fingers crossed, there's a season three, what do you hope for your character? Like what do you want for Rafael?
Zack: I've thought a lot about that. Something that was really fun about my character was that he very much had an arc, right? I love how fun it was to play around with that and just see how different he was by the end. When Raf says, "Some of us are becoming monsters," I think he's talking about himself. I mean sure, he's referring to other people, but he's also talking about himself. And I think that he is a little bit scared to be in his own skin at the moment.
I think it'd be really fun to play with the idea of ‘how does one settle and reconcile the actions that you've done when pushed to your greatest limits,’ right? And what is the justification of doing something that you think may ‘be a good thing’ but others may not, right?
It's so interesting to watch who Raf is now and what this means for him. I'd like to see him take on a role of leadership. I think that he is definitely ready for it. I think that he's a level head that maybe could have been more necessary and useful on the island if he was more outspoken and had the courage to do so.
I would love to see more collaboration between him and some other characters. Obviously, I'd love to keep working with Sarah and I'd love to explore how these two forces are so different. I've been saying that Leah and Raf — their input is the same, but their output is different. I think that they both have the same intentions. They have the same goals. They have similar backgrounds, but they express them vastly differently.
But a more outspoken version of Raf would be great.
Cariann: That is fascinating. Yes. I would love to see that, too. And I don't want to take much more of your time. I really appreciate—
Zack: No, this is awesome. I could be here all day. This is great.
Cariann: I really appreciate you talking to me and I love this show. I think it's beautiful. I think the work that you've put into your character is great. I love Raf. Hopefully I get to see him for another season. I just appreciate what you're doing — making art that's connecting with people. It's beautiful and it's what keeps us going and I'm always grateful to learn more about it.
Zack: Well, that's really sweet. Thank you very much. This has been lovely. And congratulations on the work that you've done with your dad.
Cariann: Thank you so much for saying that.
Zack: And whether it progresses further or it stops here for now, take pride in the fact that you did tough shit.
Cariann: Yeah.
Zack: Because a lot of people wouldn't.
Cariann: Yeah. And just be kind. Be kind to ourselves.
Zack: "It’s chaos — be kind."
MAY 2022 — PHOTOS BY MATT EASTON — INTERVIEW BY CARIANN BRADLEY